Nicole Rzonzew
PsychoEducational Director
One of the terms we've come to hear the most in today's conversations is bullying. Continue reading to learn 10 strategies for prevention, intervention and support.
Years ago, the word was unheard of; kids bothered each other, kids were mean to each other, but no one went home and said they were bullied.
Definition of Bullying
The term “bullying” has roots in the Middle Dutch word “boele,” which means lover or brother. Over time, its meaning shifted to describe someone who was blustering or intimidating. By the 18th century, the term “bully” was used to refer to a swaggering, overbearing person. The modern understanding of bullying as an aggressive behavior meant to intimidate or harm others emerged in the 20th century, and the term “bullying” came to be associated with this behavior.
The term “bullying” began to gain more prominence and recognition in the late 20th century, particularly during the 1970s and 1980s. During this time, researchers, educators, and advocates started to pay greater attention to the issue of bullying in schools and other settings. Efforts to raise awareness and address the harmful effects of bullying led to an increased use of the term in public discourse, educational materials, and policies. As our understanding of bullying evolved, the term became widely recognized and understood as a form of aggressive behavior with serious consequences.
Today, the actual definition of Bullying is a repeated and intentional aggressive behavior that involves an imbalance of power or strength, typically carried out by an individual or group to harm, intimidate, or control another person. It can occur in various forms, such as verbal, physical, social, or online, and is often aimed at causing emotional distress or harm to the victim.
In light of these developments, we now understand that bullying is a relationship issue. We tend to think that it’s a discipline issue, but when we understand that the dynamic comes from an imbalance in relationships, we can see it from a different perspective so that we can prevent it.
Children are born with a particular temperament. Some of them are born with a difficult temperament that comes from some form of prenatal stress. As those children grow, because of their lack of self-regulation and out of control behaviors, they tend to get excluded from relationships. They constantly get punitive measures applied to them to tame or control those same behaviors. With time, those children have had so many exclusions that the empathy centers of the brain begin to shut off.
According to Dr. Becky Bailey, around the age of 7, those children begin to morph into two very different paths: Bullies and Victims. The bullies have begun producing neurochemicals that help them deal with the pain of having a life of exclusion. The victims lack that “internal pharmacy” and since the only connection they manage to get is with the bully, they stay in the dynamic.
Research suggests that effective strategies to deal with bullying involve a combination of prevention, intervention, and support:
- Prevention: Creating a positive and respectful environment is crucial. Schools and organizations need to implement anti-bullying policies, promote empathy and kindness, and establish clear rules against bullying. Our program Goodness™ works hand in hand with schools to make kindness and empathy the core of every activity and to understand the lack of those as a call for help so that everyone involved gets the support they need.
- Education: Raising awareness about bullying and its effects helps individuals recognize and report it. Education can empower bystanders to intervene and support victims.
- Early Intervention: Identifying and addressing bullying behavior as early as possible can prevent it from escalating. Teachers, parents, and peers should be vigilant and take action promptly.
- Open Communication: Encouraging victims to talk about their experiences and feelings can help them cope. Providing a safe space for reporting bullying is essential. This is the reason why, with Goodness, we strive for everyone to understand that it is safe to be yourself.
- Bystander Intervention: Empowering bystanders to speak up and support victims can help stop bullying. Bystanders can play a significant role in deterring bullies and providing comfort to those affected.
- Consequences: Applying appropriate consequences for bullying behavior sends a message that it is not tolerated. Consistent consequences can discourage bullies from repeating their actions.
- Support for Victims: Offering emotional and psychological support to victims is crucial for their well-being. Counseling, peer support, and involving parents can help victims cope and recover.
- Restorative Justice: Using restorative practices can help bullies understand the impact of their actions and make amends to the victim and the community.
- Online Bullying: Addressing cyberbullying requires educating individuals about responsible online behavior, setting privacy controls, and having open discussions about internet safety.
- Parental Involvement: Parents play a vital role in preventing and addressing bullying. They should communicate with their children, be attentive to their social interactions, and work with schools to address any issues.
It’s important to note that the appropriate approach may vary based on the specific circumstances and individuals involved. Collaborative efforts between schools, parents, communities, and organizations are key to effectively addressing and preventing bullying.
With Goodness™, we understand that every member of the school is unique. Every child has different needs, and our goal is to help teachers, administrators and the school community to provide safe environments where connection is the driver to guide children so they can grow up and become the best versions of themselves. Let’s talk!